heartache
September 30, 2010 by adam
Comments (6)
its getting harder every day for me and pain is growing in my heart, just want to numb the pain some how, feel alone, rejected and my self esteem getting lower. I battle thes feelings every day staying in faith and hoping I dont break, then i look at the kids some days i just break down crying when i get alone or go into my room and shut the door. Longing for just a phone call from you, hoping for an encouraging word just a sliver of hope to keep me standing another day.I go to church night after night in prayer for the one I love standing with others praying in the circle with quiet desperation in my heart. faith I have faith and hope. I look to the word of God, I look to christian tv listening for a word from God. I take a scripture and stand on it, confessing it. Yet i dont know whats happening with you, I cant see you, not much communication. But I believe with God all things are possible I dont have to see, just believe, not in man, not in circumstances, not in feelings But in Gods word and our savior Jesus. so ill praise through the pain, ill get on my knees and put my hands in the air. ill cry and hurt for the one I love on the floor of my room and yet ill thank the lord for you, ill pray for you, ill stand for you when the enemy shouts at me to quit, she dont love you, your a fool, you dont need her. DEVIL YOUR A LIAR AND A DECEIVER AND I REBUKE YOU. I AM MORE THAN A CONQUER, GREATER IS HE WHO IS IN ME THEN HE WHO IS IN THE WORLD. I do need her, she does love me, she is the mother of my children, my wife, lover and friend. The two shall become one flesh, she is part of me and I part of her. I LOVE YOU so i will keep pressing on, i will keep praying, i will keep standing, i will keep crying and not let my heart get hardened, ill keep breaking and let the lord put me back together and some day he will put us back together. I cant go by my feelings because they change everyday and are driven by circumstance or external things even what we eat and drink, so ill go by the word of God which never changes. Love conquers all and covers a multitude of sins.I love you Glenda, there is no one else like you.
I pray for you adam...I am finally coming from hell my self..Im not completely out..but I can feel the releif...you will too..You just have to keep looking up, and reading and fighting...you will get there...he has not left you...remember he is carrying you..it wil all wrk out if you have faith in the LORD...I know it will and I will pray with you...
The Powells Sep 30, 2010 at 10:48 am Flag as inappropriate
Adam- Put on the armor of God and keep fighting our enemy, but remember always that we fight from victory in the name of Jesus. God always keeps his promises, so don't back down.
I'll keep praying for you.
elke_i Oct 4, 2010 at 7:38 pm Flag as inappropriate
Adam, i identify with you right now. i am in your shoes right now. i wronged my husband over the years to the point that i felt like he was my problem until the day God removed scales from my eyes and heart and finally i saw how fallen i was and repented before God. All along i have been passing through the emotions you have vividly described such that i feel like you were reading me like a book. let us hope in the lord Gord for Him alone is able to restore our broken relationships. Kindly read ,lamentations 3 : 24 and Jeremiah 32: 27 and always trust in God even to the point of death. My husband has refused to listen to me and forgive me but i know God will change him in due course as i continue to wait upon him. Risper from Kenya
Risper Oct 15, 2010 at 5:00 am Flag as inappropriate
one more thing brother Adam, never listen to the lies of the devil. What God has put together no man, demon, devil will put asunder. God always prevail against the enemy so do not look at the present cicunstances but see beyond now for God will surely restore your marriage to a level beyond your expectation. God bless you and keep trusting Him always. risper
Risper Oct 15, 2010 at 5:05 am Flag as inappropriate
Hi Adam,
Pray the the following points at midnight.
May the power of God rest upon you.
1. O Spirit of life that raised up Jesus from the dead, breathe life into
- my marriage
- my dream life
- every dead area of my life
- my calling
- every organ in my body
- the work of my hands
- my potentials
- my talents in Jesus' name.
2.O Lord, Let all spirits of fear, depression, worry and despair release me now in the mighty name of Jesus.
3.O Lord, create me in a clean heart and renew a right spirit within me in Jesus' name.
And visit this website--> http://www.unlockmymarriage.com/
WWMMACAU Feb 9, 2011 at 11:08 am Flag as inappropriate
Gerald DeBruyn
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Preach it Adam. I just hear the Holy Spirit in you to keep going and Atanding firm in the Lord Jesus Christ. I know absolutely what you are saying. I had cried my eyes out so much that I don't think I had any tears left. And as I am writing this right now my eyes are turning teary. I can't even se the letters on my key board. Lord I ask for Your mercy and grace, what am I doing so wrong that I don't see anything different about my wife LeAnn. I sent her four to six e-mails this week and I have no response. Help me Lord. Give me strength. Thanks Lord for the stand Adam is having in Your Name. Give him a Touch of You hand on his soul. You are so Precious Lord Jesus whom I turn to in my quiet hours. Thanks Adam for sharing.
Gerald DeBruyn Sep 30, 2010 at 10:41 am Flag as inappropriate