September 15, 2010 by Christy   Comments (4)

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I haven't been on here in a while and I missed you and thought of you all (Hi Hope) a lot. I'm honestly hoping you get more positivity and hope out of my experience than anything. Glorify God!

I fell into a very dark time dealing with satan's tricks and hitting rock bottom, basically. I became very ill and in a lot of pain, sin and tempation which turned to fear. Lesson: Remember God is there! satan imitated Him again...

I almost gave up but my friends wouldn't let me. They helped strengthened my faith. I became so anxious I didn't want to talk to anyone. I finally had no choice to go to the ER and what a surprise and wake up call! My doctor was extremely compassionate and to me that meant a lot. I'm happy to say my health is getting better.

My family began to push me away. I lost someone I loved a lot. I had 2 friends left. My boyfriend and most important, Christ. His faith is at times shaky but became stronger as well. Since everyone was taken away all I had was God and that was all I needed. I read scripture and talked to Him. We became closer. Of course, satan hates that (we know that!). He caught me again and my therapist of 5 years and I got into an argument and he refused to see me anymore. He didn't like bringing God up I think he questioned my sanity at times.

I ended up randomly looking through other therapists since I saw who I was hurting and saw how God was working in my life. I can't give up on His plan. I found a guy (or God did..) and called him. I thought "Why not?". I expected him to be harsh and criticizing but guess what? He was amazingly compassionate, optimistic and listened.  I saw a Bible on his desk and it caught my attention. I asked him about it. He had studied at a semenary before practicing! He knows Christ?? This was so knew to me. We began putting faith and God into this. He even found a support group for me.  He recommeded I read 1 John. I must have given him a shocked look because he laughed. I'm not used to this like I said but I could get used to it haha.

My lesson? never doubt the Lord. I forget that a lot >.< at least He reminds me.

Today I'm becoming more social and learning to overcome my anxiety. I've also met a lot of people in my situation and worse who have taught me so much. I guess it was all a blessing in disguise. Like Natalie Grant sang (been listened to Held) "can we not wait for one hour watching for our Savior?" 

God bless you all and lots of love,