This is what else i've wanted to say, what I could not get off my tongue the last couple of days...

I have been struggling with confidence in myself, my Faith in the Lords work in my life. I've been telling God, from my heart- that it is not Him I doubt, His power or His soverginty, but I doubt myself, my own choices and decisions that will either separate me from God, or bring me closer to God's will. I do not have Faith that I will choose right.

I have been corrected this week. My mere human understanding has been challenged.

I was reminded of Peter- when Jesus called him to step out of the boat and walk on water, do you remember that? Peter's Faith was great, his Faith in Jesus- Jesus said he could, that's what he was going to do. I imagine him eagerly scrambling to the side expediently to do the miraculous. That's amazing, good job Peter. But then, Peter began to sink. I picture him looking down, realising the circumstances he was in, surrounded by the crashing waves and confronted with his human understanding of the laws pf physics. Peter still did not doubt Jesus, he actually called out to Jesus to save him. Peter doubted himself, his understanding of the situation, and his abilities. "oh ye of little faith". Jesus was not referring to his spiritual Faith, but his Faith in what Jesus told him he could do.

God said His power will be upon you when He leads you to accomplish something. Oh my little Faith- in what God told me to do. Oh little Faith in the person God said I was. I am the child of the king of the universe, there is nothing I can't do when God has set the way. God will provide for me with His power when He sees fit. My choices cannot stop the will of God from coming to pass. His purpose will prevail, no matter what mistakes I make. I fear being set back from His purpose, but that is why I have been told to rely on Him for understanding and wisdom.

My Faith is in the future, renewed to my abilites and sense of self. God has put me in His purpose by the way of hardship and adversity. I am in the smack dab of God's will.

I pray for wisdom and understanding- I pray for the guidance of the Spirit- and most importanty for the strength of will to obey. For all God's people...