I started wrking 3rd earlier in the week..It seems like the days blend together...It is so weird, but I like it.  I feel like I have gotten so much in my life accomplished on this shift..I have spent so much time with my kids when the other times even if it was my day off I felt like I was just trying to play catch up..We went to a foot ball game, the playground, and the appleseed festivle all this week, even by myself with out my mother or husband..For I guess for the last couple of years I have been afraid to be alone with them out in public..I dont know why.I never realy understood it..I guess it was just a reasurance thing for myself that if something went wrong or happened there was another set of hands..some one to look at for assistance if needed...I dont really know..but I think that is over now.  I can do stuff by myself now..I feel so much more alive as well..So crazy..I have never felt this self confident before in my life...Always happy on the outside but never really on the inside, yet now I am..The wall is slowly breaking down...yet deep down I still wonder if it is one of those sunshine before the storm type of things..That usual seems how my life has wrked..I get something good/great and then bam crash..all falls apart..\

My wrk is finally training me as a nurse in between hours as an aide as well...My pay checks are nicer cuz i can wrk more hours on 3rd...I have made some new friends as well...I am still having issues with my husband, but now it seems like it doesnt bother me...I am waterproof..so hopefully if it rains it will just repel right off...Good night world...I have to go to wrk...GOD BLESS